Growing Pains


is(14)God is calling us all to grow in faith like never before, I believe. Every time you face a difficulty you are force to grow in faith. If you refused to grow, you will always end up dropping your standards and before long you are lukewarm and going with the rest of the world. I believe the reason for this massive moment is obvious. Jesus is getting His church ready for a spiritual war like never before. Without the gifts of the Holy Spirit for example, I don’t believe we will survive. I believe we are going to be needing miracles on a daily basis. I remember reading a prophesy ages ago and it said that it is going to be normal for people to have the gift of casting out devils, because this gift is going to be so much in demand. I want to point out that you don’t have to be a bad person to be oppressed by demons. In some cases it is almost like catching a cold. They can enter into you through, excess fear or you may be too overcome by grief, for example. There is so many people who have been deeply hurt and are badly in need of healing. One way to look at it, the spiritual gifts are no longer a luxury for a few. It is now a necessity for the whole church to start calling on God, to help them grow in this area of service. Even if it is only to help out your own family and friends. You never know when you are going to be in need of them.

Expect The Unexpected with The Holy Spirit

By living in each moment with our Lord and just putting one foot in front of the other, you will be surprise what is around the corner. Just following His lead, something big can come out from something so small, you didn’t consider it was of any value. I have mention in another article that I have written, that I am making a very deliberate effort each day to put aside a time to pray in tongues, and I am finding it a challenge. It is not my favourite way of praying, but I know I would be mad not to. The Holy Spirit has been so kind to give me an English word over and over again. I thought at first to keep me satisfied. I have just found out today, He has not just been giving me an English word, but a word of knowledge. This is a brand new gift for me. I wrote down what I thought it meant in my journal and I had a full length page and a half of information that flowed out of me. When God speaks to you they say it just flows out of you. That happens to me when I am writing sometimes. So you can have gifts from God already and because there is no education out there, you are none the wiser. In other words you have a gift to help yourself and others, but haven’t been taught how to.

How I got into self-deliverance was a matter of urgency. I had to find a way to get sleep someway, and since the doctors, counsellors and etc. couldn’t help me. I had no choice but, to turn to God to learn how to do faith healing. The only means to learn, was from books and there are YouTube shows on the subject. Trial and error for some is the only way to learn that is available. I believe we all should start trying now whether you can find somebody to teach you or not.

Hebrews 4:16

 Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace.

I had no one to help me, and if you are in the same boat, which I believe many are, why don’t you ask God to open your eyes to what gifts He wants you to have. Then start praying for it. Also find opportunities to use the gift. Ask God to train you to use it wisely for His glory. Faith is not always an easy grace to receive for some people. At one point I was asking for a miracle to happen and it wasn’t happening, then I thought well I will repent to God of my stubborn pride that refuses to believe in a child-like faith. So I did and the very next moment the pain went.

I often use other people’s prayers and then re- arrange them to my liking. I got this prayer original from a Catholic prayer book called ‘The Pieta Prayer Book.’ You can get it on the internet. My version of it is;

Eternal Daddy

Eternal Daddy, I love you, I offer up the Sacred Heart of Y’shua. With all its love and all its sufferings and all its merits for… (You make your request, I usually keep it very simple, to the point and I say the whole prayer over and over again using the rosary beads. It is entirely up to you how you want to do it.)

I know God loves this prayer and highly approves of it. He has shown me a vision of God the Father looking down on His Son’s Heart and He doesn’t even look at the request. It is automatically answered. Now of course Jesus would never offer His Heart to anybody, especially to His Father if it is not in keeping with the Will of Our Heavenly Father. If you asking something that doesn’t honour God’s nature, then you know it will be a no. Sometimes you have to just keep it up. And if you want a prayer answered quiet often you also need to do your bit. Somebody I knew had the gift of prophecy and she told somebody they will get a job. The man just laid down on the lounge expecting a phone call, without any effort on his part and of course the phone never rang for him. He end up going out and looking for a job, which he did find. So you do usually have to do your bit as well.


Hail Mary Full of Grace

There is a huge difference between honouring somebody and worshiping somebody. I honour my parents, and especially my father. Not because I love him more than my mother. Some people might be confused by what I have just said. The last few months of his life I saw the making of a saint before my eyes. I know people are thinking I am just boasting here, but that is not it. I love God with my all, so anybody who brings me closer to God in any way, I am going to appreciate them. To see a making of a saint before your eyes, helps you to understand first what a saint is, secondly how straight and narrow the road that leads to life eternal is and that God can do all things even to people who you think is least likely and so much more. I saw things during his trial that was incredibly beautiful and amazing about God. I also saw the opposite, the horrific attacks Satan placed on him. It is no small war becoming a saint. You have to give your all to become one. And God is right there for you and most willing to make you one. God told my mother and myself at the same time that what my father was going through in a few months, was what a saint normally takes a whole life time to reach. So yes I can’t help be amazed at what God did for him.

When I was a young Protestant back nearly forty years ago, Protestant thought less of Mary than they do today. I rejoice when I hear Protestants spending time meditating on the role Mary played in our redemption, even though they probably wouldn’t say it like that. I remember my Minster back in the old days, even though a good man, with a sneer of disapproval on his face, he told me that he read that Mary and St. Joseph were bad parents. Even then my heart was saying how could they have been bad parents? Where does he get that idea from? He certainly didn’t get it from the Holy Bible.

People Don’t Understand Catholic that Wellis(2)

 I don’t know how many times my heart feels like it is breaking when I hear how Protestants misinterpret Catholic’s relationship with Mary as worshiping. I am not saying there aren’t some Catholics that have over step the line, but certainly not all Catholics have. And I know if we dare call ourselves Christians, we have to first obey God foremost, otherwise it is a lie. God doesn’t want us to consider ourselves superior to others. He wants us to love one another as He loves us. Therefore God does not look kindly on people who act as if they have the authority to judge another; that role belongs entirely to Him. Especially when we judge somebody in His name.  Judging others will backfire.  Instead of judging somebody when you see has a fault, you should pray for them out of your love for that person and God. That way God will not judge you.

How many times I have seen in my own life (and no doubt you have seen it in your own too) when people have judge me wrongly. They judge by outward appearance. They judge by what it looks like to them. How many times a very little innocent thing has been taken out of contexts and made to look like something that in truth was not at all happening. We have all been guilty of it. Pride in our own reasoning is not healthy, but instead dangerous to the road of sainthood. The straight and narrow road that only a few will find, mostly, because we don’t want to discipline ourselves. We want to go on the broad and easy road that many travel on, because on this road we need not care about how we hurt others, we simply do what we like and then we have a nerve to call it good.

God Will Teach You All things if You are Open to Him

God looks into the heart of the matter. Protestant do not know what God Himself teachers the Catholics, because very few Protestants will read and study what Catholics saints have been told by God. I was told by one lady that she did her homework. She knew what Catholics believed in, because her mother was a Catholic and her grandmother was a practising Catholic. So was my mother a practising Catholic and my grandmother too was a practising Catholic. I still didn’t have a clear understanding of Mary. I remember one day I really wanted to know what the rosary was all about. So I asked my mother and she was trying to explain it to me. I couldn’t understand what she was talking about, so very unlike me, because I do respect and honour my mother too, in my frustration I threw the rosary beads at her and I said ‘say it!!’ So my mother starting saying the rosary and then I got it. I then understood what she was talking about.

More you look into Marys sacrifice the more you love her. ‘Love one another as I have loved you’ is a commandment of Jesus. People you owe your life to, always holds a special place of honour in your heart. If you do not have that special place of honour towards them, there is something wrong with you. You simply would not be a very humble or grateful kind of person would you? One day I was worried about one of my cats, he wasn’t getting enough attention. He isn’t as demanding as all my other animals are. So I had to go out of my way to give him the attention he needed and immediately he is now demanding attention like all the others. Now I received a lesson from it, and it was the more time you spend with a person or animal, the more you get to know their personalities and therefore the more you love and appreciate them. Now that might sound a very odd thing to compare this lesson with what I learnt about Mary, the Mother of Jesus here. The truth of the matter is, if you don’t spend time meditating the honour Mary received as the Mother of Jesus in the first place, you are going to miss out on many blessings.

Jesus Wants Mary to be Honoured by All of Us

Jesus wants His Mother to be honoured and thanked for the important role she played in our redemption. If she had said ‘no’ we would be in a lot of trouble. She was especially created to be the Mother of Jesus. Nobody would have been able to take her place. No one would have been strong enough to take her place. She was more valuable than a prophet. God will tell a prophet if you don’t do it, I will get somebody else to do it. This is not the case with Mary. You don’t know things about Mary as the Catholics saints do. Jesus and Mary both tell the Catholic saints things that the Protestants saints are not willing to hear, so they are not told. Jesus and Mary will not speak to them about it. Generally speaking you have to be both humble and open enough, before God will talk to you on any subject. I have had only one experience out of all my experiences where Jesus branched out onto something I wasn’t prepared or opened for.

And that was when I was about eight years old. I saw Jesus in spirit, sitting on my bed and on His lap was a very small white lamb. And He was stroking it and told me it was me. I couldn’t understand it and I looked up and said to God the Father, ‘that is blaspheme only Jesus is the Lamb of God.’ Then a thought came to my mind and it said ‘who is this talking to you.’ Then I thought only people commit blaspheme not Jesus and so then I looked at Jesus again. I saw Him bent over with a stick in His hand drawing something on the ground. (I didn’t know that is exactly what Jesus did with the women that was caught as adulterous in the Gospel.) I saw Jesus had a beautiful smirk on His face. He thought it was funny. I then turn my attention towards the lamb and was trying to work it out. Then the visitation ended.  I was left still wondering what it all meant. Why I have brought this up is to say out of all my experiences this is the only time God left me confused. In that it was too advance for me at that time to work it out.

I am sorry if I have to keep relying on my supernatural experiences to explain things, but I know I am called to write and to teach what I know. Since I am not a scholar I have only my experiences to go by. I let God worry about the outcome of everything I do or write.

Waking Up to the Power of His Love for Us

I watched a very interesting documentary on seeing if young children would wake up during a fire alarm blaring the way it does. Parents stood by shocked to see their children deep into sleep and how difficult it was to wake them up, even while the alarm was sounding. I feel that is a very good comparison to many Christians who are asleep to the times we are in. Not only that, but the power we children of God have over His tender Heart towards us. We may believe our Heavenly Father really and truly loves us, but there is still a little doubt ‘will He answer this prayer? Am I asking too much? I am too unworthy for God to do miracles through me? It is pride wanting me to ask this of Him? And so on. Now I have the same problem.  

We Are in a New Era

We are in an era not only are the prophets talking about it, but I am seeing it for myself, and I am sure most of you are too. Where God is helping us along mightily for those who are at least trying to believe in this incredible love, He has for all of us. We can see His love for us proven time and time again, throughout our lives. You might find like me in some areas your faith maybe stronger than others around you and in other areas their faith is stronger than yours. I believe our faith is the strongest where we had to rely on Him the most in our lives and where we can see countless results of His Faithfulness. Where we are weakest in faith, we haven’t been exposed enough to test Him out as it were.

You know I was listening to a YouTube show, it was a Scientist who wanted to know how the universe was made. He knew intuitively there was a Creator, so he went studying all the holy books of all the religions of the world. The last one was the Bible. Now one of the things he said that was of interest to me was, none of the other holy books ever said test this out, but the Holy Bible. There were many reason he found the Holy Bible was superior to the others, which I won’t go into. I think you have a pretty good idea anyway.

Psalm 145:18. The Lord is near to all who call on Him, to all who call on Him in truth.

isBMF7O71YToo many of us give up too easily when we are petitioning to God. God does have His reason why some prayers seem to be slow to answer. The most common reason is our lack of faith. Faith grows and matures as a rule over time, because I believe we are either are too proud to believe. ‘If I can’t do it I can’t see how God can do it either’ attitude. Or we have such a low self-esteem of ourselves we think God sees us the way other people do and the way we have been taught to see ourselves. God has never taught us to have a low self-esteem.  Low self-esteem is taught to us. Look at new born baby, they do not enter into this world with a low self-esteem. God didn’t put it there. It may come from a person’s family background and the pecking order of the society you may come from. Let’s face it humans make very bad judges. Most people have to learn to have kind thoughts towards people we consider different in any way to ourselves. Our society will dictate to you what is acceptable and what is not. If you don’t fit into society ideas of what a perfect person is then you are immediately an outcast. Jesus teaches us to be childlike. Jesus teaches us to be kind to one another. He teaches us to even love our enemies. There is not one religion in this world that teaches its people to love their enemies.

John 14:6. Jesus said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.”

Many people will argue against that, it may not be political correct, but it is correct according to God.

John 5:24. “I tell you the truth, those who listen to My message and believe in God who sent Me have eternal life. They will never be condemned for their sins, but they have already passed from death into life.”


“Love One Another As I Have Love You”

Brutality against women in the western society is on the increase. As the society moves further away from the belief of a loving God.  Humans left to their own, are very selfish creatures to the extreme. It is Jesus example in particular that teaches us how to love one another and be merciful with one another, especially towards the ones who are the most vulnerable in society. I remember once I was meditating on that men do not really have good role models on how to treat their wives and women in general. I was thinking to myself the only true role model they do have is in fact Jesus Himself. Men treat women by how they have been taught by their father’s examples and their fathers were taught by their fathers and so on. Even in Christian society’s men have treated women less important than a man. Women for example were not allowed to learn how to read and write, if they did people considered it was the work of the devil. And later in the Middle Ages when women were finally allowed to read and write, they were not to write down anything to do with the bible. In another time in history a minster of God was allowed to beat his wife with a thicker rod than most men. Now what kind of example of love and mercy is that?

Sins Against Women

I thought to myself one day that most men’s sins against women is through ignorance and at that moment I then felt God’s presence come down towards my head and He repeated to me ‘most men’s sins against women is through ignorance’. I believe He wanted me to really understand that, so I could find it easier to forgive them. You hear some horrific stories how many men have treated their wives throughout history. It is easy to hate them for it, but it is not God’s way. I haven’t met many people especially men, throughout my life. Mainly because I had suffered social phobias for nearly forty years. So it has curbed greatly my ability to mix with strangers. From time to time I have met some very charming Christlike men that reminded me not all men are brutes. Most people even many who call themselves Christians, do not follow Christ teachings. So there is very little true love in this world. To say you a Christian and not obey His commandments you are lying to yourself and others. Giving everybody who do not know Jesus the wrong impression of what Christ is really like.

1 Corinthians 13: 7-8. (Love) always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

1 Peter 1:22. Love one another deeply from the heart.

The Bible is All About God’s Love is

There is plenty of evidence of what love is and how to treat one another in the Holy Bible. So many people read it, but do not even attempt to practise it and they think they are going to go heaven after they die. What an illusion. Jesus said ‘if you love me, obey my commandments.’ Another time I was really being upset with men who treated their wives with such cruelty, I use to pray a certain prayer that asked God let those men know they will have to face His wrath over their cruelty towards women. Once again God made His presence felt and He assured me those men will. So it is a huge warning for men who think themselves as little gods and who think they can treat women how they please. God is also a God of Justice and we are all answerable to Him. Nothing else matters in this life and in the next, but how you please God. The way to please God is to obey His commandments, which is love.

Matthew 5: 7-8. “Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.

If you are not merciful you can’t expect mercy from God. You will receive the same measure you give out to others. Don’t live a lie, it is important to wake up and practise the faith as God intends you to.

1 John 4:15-17. If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in them and they in God. And so we know and rely on the love of God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgement: In this world we are like Jesus.

There have been times when I have met certain men in a group situation such as retreats and so on. We may never had said a word to each other, or in some cases only a few words to one another and yet with God who can do all things, has bonded us. We have felt very sad saying goodbye to one another.  God had allowed us to experience the spiritual connection that we were indeed brother and sister in God’s sight. When men and women do connect with one another as God originally planned for us, we complement one another. We both have something that only our gender can give and if we exchange this gift God has us to give, it is a very beautiful experience. When we don’t love one another as God wills us, we rob ourselves of God’s precious gift that we were meant to share. It is to our loss, not gain when we disobey God.


God is Always Faithful

isWNUVGOVLWe all have our favourite sacred songs that touch our hearts every time we hear them sung. Sometimes, like when you read a familiar bible verse many times over again and then one day unexpectedly, something you have read many times before, just leaps out in front of you with clearer and deeper meaning than ever before. It really touches your heart so much so, you wonder how you could ever missed it. We all know that is the Holy Spirits doing. The bible has layers and layers of deeper meaning and when we are ready, God peels off a layer so you can see deeper into the meaning of what God is saying in that verse. Well something like that happen to me with a beautiful song that I just heard. I am not sure of its title, but it was all about God’s Faithfulness. The line in particular that hold my attention was ‘God has always been faithful to me.’ I then could see past memories coming to me, of the many times God had been indeed faithful to me. Despite times when I have let Him down and sometimes I believe when He needed me the most.

Psalms is full of Wisdom

I remember I used to have a book of the Psalms that I would read every day in the train as I was going to work. It was an hour train trip and I didn’t want to waste my time just looking out of the window, every morning. I was in my early thirty’s and was going through very hard times, and I would question every now and again if God really helps out like it is written in the Psalms. I was struggling with my faith, but the Psalms gave me an anchor to put my trust in God to get me through it all. Well now thirty years later I can read the Psalms and know what David is saying is true. There is a difference in believing and putting your trust in somebody else’s experience, then when the day arrives and you can honestly say ‘I believe not because you believe, but because I have experienced it myself time and time again, as well.’ Not only that your understanding is clearer on what they are talking about.

Another line in this song that touched me was ‘God has always been faithful and He will be again.’ When you look at frightening events in the future and then turn to the bible and read all the accounts when Israel needed a miracle for its protection. God always provided it to them doesn’t matter how impossible it looked. When they humbly and sincerely turned to Him, with a pure heart God could not resist there plea for help. It didn’t matter how far they strayed from God He always came to their aid when after they sincerely repented of all their sins. It gives you peace and reassurance even though what awaits you is going to be extremely challenging. We are in this is very evil world and we will have great trials to overcome and many of those trials do not come from God, but from the enemy blaming God.

Isaiah 25:1

Lord, You are my God. I will exalt You, I will praise Your name, for You have done wonderful things. Your counsels of old are faithfulness and truth.

How do we enter into a Relationship with God?

isPMK3SZJMEverybody is different and everybody’s situation is different so God works with you in a very individual way. We have general rules, but there is always exceptions to that rule. I remember reading a book from a very famous faith healer in the 70’s her name was Kathryn … I am sorry but I think her surname was Koolman. I never really remember names that well, I always remember the information, but very rarely the person’s name who gave it. She was ask by many people to write a book on healing and she said every time she said ‘Jesus doesn’t do it this way, He went and did’, so she then had to rewrite that chapter.

These are some of the general rules how to begin a relationship with God.

1.      You must really want the relationship with all your heart. More you want it the stronger your relationship will be.

2.      Expect God will try you at first, to see how much you want it, if not to get you to want it all the more. The more you want something the harder you are willing to go without, do, find, wait and yearn for, etc.

3.      Read the Holy Bible and get to know God that way.

4.      Read up spiritual books that helps you, don’t bother with the ones that are too advance for you, because you won’t understand a word they are saying. They just end up confusing you.

5.      Put aside daily prayer and meditate often on how much God loves you accordingly to the Bible.

6.      Put God’s commandments into practise. All God’s commandments are based on pure holy love. ‘Don’t do anything to others that you wouldn’t want done unto you.’ For example you don’t want people to lie, cheat, steal, be unkind to you in any way, so therefore you don’t do these things to other people. It has to do with how to treat people correctly and God with love.

7.      Then experiment. Talk to Him as if you can see Him. The more you talk and open up in a childlike manner, the more joy you will experience. Being childlike is to be the pure you, let your head go and talk to Him as if He is your best and most trusted Friend, Father, and Brother, Spouse or companion. Somebody who you really can trust and love with all your heart. Somebody you can depend on. And somebody who allows you to be yourself without worrying about how it looks to them.

8.      Don’t worry if you seem silly, because you feel like you are talking to thin air, talk always as if you can see Him whether you do or not.


We are growing closer to God all the time and we are trying out new things all the time. As our understanding of Him grows, we find new ways of loving Him. All my life I have rushed here and there, I am just learning and it has taken me eighteen months to get this far too really stop and really have a good look at God in His creations and talk to Him through His creations. Sometimes I feel God’s presence in His creations, but not always. Sometimes I feel His power or He may communicate something to me. He doesn’t always show up as it were. God knows the best time to do this and when to keep hiding, so that you will learn to walk in faith and also to love Him all the time, not just when you are getting something from Him.

Having a Real Relationship with God

I watch a lot of YouTube videos and for some reason I am very interested in Muslims converting to Christ. One of the things they keep stressing with the Muslim religion, they can’t be sure if they will go to heaven or not. They say if their god is willing. (We do not serve the same God and it is easy proven).  When they become Christians they find not only has Jesus paid for all their sins, but if they believe in Him they will go to heaven. There is no if’s or maybe’s. It is the promise of God. We Christians who are born again, know Jesus has made a place for us in heaven, but we must first believe He is who He says He is. And that is He is the true Messiah who came down from heaven as the son of man and the son of God. And we also believe He died for our sins and rose again on the third day, so that we may be made worthy to enter the Kingdom of God. If we believe in Him we are going to follow Him on His terms, which is to Love God with all our hearts, and with all our mind and with all our strength. And also to love one another as He loves us. How can you love a god who has no relationship with you or you him? Who you can only visualise as being right up there in the heavens as being superior to you and all you have is nothing but fear of him. I don’t believe you can. To love Him truly you first need to know Him so that you can have a real loving relationship with Him.

Who are the Real ChristiansisNQHK1W8I

Many people call themselves Christians, but will have a shock on Judgement day. If you do not have a relationship with Him it is because you do not know Him, nor are you obeying Him. Some people know Him but refuse to follow Him that is ‘the unforgiveable sin’, if you die in that state you will go to hell. Some people are truly looking for Him and they will find Him if they keep asking Jesus. It is a promise Jesus has made to us. ‘ask you will receive, seek and you shall find, knock and the door will be open to you.’  The big secret is keep asking, seeking and knocking. The more you do it the more you are going to see your prayers will be answered so powerfully, because you have waited.  You will get back pay and you will find God will give you interest on the interest, because of your faithfulness in waiting. God does test us to see how we will behave. In other words how much do we really want what we are asking for? He is so generous, that He will always rewards us when we are willing to stay faithful to Him. God is not a hostile God for one thing. There are so many people who see Him as a judgemental God. They may not say so out loud, but they do from within. So how can you love such a God whom you think doesn’t love you? There are plenty of people who call themselves Christian who do think this way, because they do not know Him.

I am not ignoring the fact that God is not only a God of Mercy but also a God of Justice. We need to be balanced how we see God. If we make ourselves His enemy by denying His right to be treated like a sovereign God and so therefore do not honour Him and Respect Him and go our own way, we are going to experience the God of Justice sooner or later. And God is to be feared if you disobey Him and have no intention of repenting from a humble contrite heart, with the only true desire is to love Him as He deserves to be. If you are for Him you will receive such love from Him that it makes you desire to worship Him above all else, because there is no other god like Him. He is truly wonderful to those who serve Him above all else.

You can be a Christian in name only and their numbers far outweigh the numbers of true Christians that do really love God with all their hearts and with all their minds and with all their strength and love their neighbour as Jesus loves us.  Don’t be alarm in that there are many levels of knowing Him. Like the way happy married couples do. People’s love for each other grow as they become to know one another better. As in happy marriage couples who have been married over long periods of time. Their love for one another is growing constantly. So much so that, what they use to call love for one another, now doesn’t look like love to them, because their love not only grows stronger but purer. That is how it works with the love we have for our God. The longer we serve Him from love, and the more we do as He says, we become to know Him even more. The more we know Him the more we discover how much more beautiful He really is.  There are many marriages that do not do the hard work to make their marriages successful, they are not willing to make sacrifices for one another graciously from love, so how can it work.

God Created Marriage so that We Understand Our Relationship With Him

God has created things on earth as to reflect upon, so we can see similarities with Him. Marriage is one of the most important things that God has created so that we may know and understand how our relationship with Him works. If there is no love in the marriage, it is not holy and so does not resemble the marriage of the Lamb and His Bride. One person may be doing all they can to make the marriage work, but it takes both to make it work. And the one who is not putting an effort into the marriage to make it work as God desires them to, will be very answerable to God. Because God is sovereign and we need to understand that. We shouldn’t take things so lightly. We are either for God or we are against Him. It is not easy serving God. Only because we are such sinners and we keep messing things up, but if we keep turning to Him in humility and repent. God will not turn His back on us. We also should ask God for the grace to overcome our weaknesses and put everything into His hands. God will help and He will always forgive and forget our sins if we are truly are repented from our hearts, thanks to Jesus sacrifice of atonement.